Archive for May, 2008

Interesting facts…MeMe…

May 30, 2008

I was tagged by this awesome blogger for this MeMe…This is going to be tough as I am trying to think of some interesting facts about myself.

Write six random things about yourself.  Tag six people at the end of your post linking to their blog.
Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Here goes!

1.  Whenever I’m watching tv I have to have a blanket over me.  It doesn’t matter if it is 90 degrees or -30 degrees.

2.  I am anal!!!  I am set in my ways and I have my routines I MUST do daily.  When I wake up, I must have a cup of coffee and watch the news before getting into the shower.  If this is not done, my entire day is shot.  Also, before going to bed, every single dish in my sink MUST be washed.  If I don’t do this, it seriously bothers me and I have a hard time getting to sleep.  There is nothing worse then waking up to a sink full of dishes from the night before.  I think I have a touch of OCD.

3.  I am a VERY sarcastic person.  Sometimes?? Too sarcastic and my mouth gets me into trouble.  I have a comment for everything.  This is not good and it is very hard to contain.  Somedays, I feel like I need a muzzle.

4.  I love traveling.  If I had the funds, I would travel the world and take vacations very, very often.  To go along with traveling I am terrified of heights.  However, I LOVE flying!! In fact, when I do fly, I have to sit next to the window so I can see outside.  Weird!!

5.  I am a VERY PICKY eater.  I do not eat red meat.  In fact the thought of it makes me sick!  Once in a while, I will eat a hamburger (but that is it for meat), however, if someone even mentions where the meat came from, I get extremely ill and totally loose my appetite.  I used to own a fish tank, and during lent, on fridays when I had fish for dinner, I had to put a towel over the tank.  The thought I was eating one of their relatives made me sick and I could not eat. 

6.  I used to HATE, DESPISE country and western music.  In fact I have fond memories of my family driving to FL when we were younger.  When my dad was driving, he used to blast the air conditioner and blast the country and western music.  I hated it and complained often! Now?  I LOVE it and even steal his music when I’m home.   In fact most of my music collection is made up of country and western music.  It’s not that twaingy crap, but the more recent style of country.  He reminds me of our family vacations often….haha

Well I don’t know how interesting all that is..but at 5:30 in the morning, this is the best I can do.  My brain isn’t exactly up to par right now.

 Most people I read have already been tagged..so if you have not been tagged for this meme…then consider yourself “it”.  GO ahead..it can be fun…Don’t make me name names…

 

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Feel the burn…….

May 29, 2008

I finally got the long awaited WiiFit on Tuesday!! I am so freakin excited!!  I did a little of it on Tuesday but due to other obligations..I didn’t try it out until around 10pm…and continued to use it until 11.  I absolutely LOVE it!  Last night, I did it for 50 minutes.  I did every single strength, aerobic, yoga, and game exercise it had on it and even the ones I unlocked.  This morning?? I’m kinda sore.  I think the strength exercises is what did it.  They totally kicked my butt.  I mean seriously, is there anyone out there who can do push ups?? I certainly can not.  In fact, after my first attempt, the damn computer (tv/wii/my wii personal trainer) told me I was giving up too easily and to keep trying…um yeah sure..it’s easy for YOU to do it because your freakin programed to do it…while I am not!! 

As for the yoga poses..dear god…there is a reason humans are not considered “trees”.  Although I do it, it keeps telling me…”you seem a little shaky” YA THINK?  It’s not normal for a human to stand one 1 foot for minutes on end!!  It’s funny.  But yet it’s good.  I really do like it.  OH yeah it also made it quite clear, that I?? was a bit stiff. haha too funny!

The running part of the aerobics…I did the short run and the long run…again it’s fun.  But how much in “real” life, running seems to be a pain in the ass for me to do, but with the wii, I have no problems with it??  Is it because I’m standing in 1 place, while doing it? Who knows. 

As for the games, the hula hoops–I’m getting better, I think last night I got 300 spins and only 1 hula hoop hit me in the face.  The soccer, I’ve finally figured it out, though I still get hit in the head with the shoes and teddy bears, cruel I tell ya.  Tight rope, hmm yeah I jumped on accident, and the damn thing went blank and told me NOT to jump and started me all over! Dammit!! But finally on the 3rd try I did it, crossed to finish line, but it was kinda difficult and took a lot of training. 

The balancing parts, did you know when you stand straight, your knees need to be slightly bent?? Hmm I did not!  Who knew…in fact it seems quite odd for me to do that..but whatever my wii fitness training must know what she’s talking about right?? haha

Anyway, it’s fun people!  I do have to be careful though because certain things do bother my knee A LOT!!!  In fact this morning my knee is kinda sore.  I’m not sure if it is a good sore or a bad one…but either way I need to favor it.  One would think a year after surgery, I would be back to normal…but who really knows. Tonight I’m going to try the Wii Ski…should be interesting!

MeMe

May 28, 2008

This Awesome person tagged me a couple days ago…yeah I’m slacking..sorry. 

Here are the rules: Each player answers the questions about themselves.At the end of the post, the player tags other people and posts their name, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read you. : )
1. What were you doing 10 years ago?  I just moved back from college (working on my Masters) and was living at home.  Working two jobs…and enjoying a carefree life….

2.  What are 5 snacks that you enjoy?  Almonds, 100 calorie snack packs, pretzels, apples, cheese slices

3.  What are 5 things you would do if you were a billionaire?  pay off my college loans, and my credit cards, travel the world and buy my parents a house in the south.  I would also like to start a program so my kids would not have to go back home when they leave us–something where they actually have a chance to be successful and stay out of trouble.  And last but not least, take all of my friends on a vacation and have a true GIRLIE vacation!
4.  What are 5 fun things you wish you could do today?  see my nieces, take a mental health day and do absolutely NOTHING, baske in the sun while reading a good book, (dang it’s hard to come up with 5 things) be stressfree for just 1 day(yes to me this would be fun!)  go camping.

Ok so I now need to tag people…lets see…I tag you and you.

Awesome weekend…

May 27, 2008

Well my college friend came friday and the weekend?? Was awesome!  Really it was nice to have someone here and to do things with.  We spent most of the weekend outside taking small day trips here and there.  Friday we just went to the mall and then to Red Lobster for dinner..came home and watched a movie..hung out and talked.  It’s been almost a year since we’ve seen eachother so we had a bit of catching up to do. 

Saturday, we woke up early (gotta love being teachers..no sleeping in for us) went for a walk and then came back and played the wii for like 2 1/2 hours.  She had never played before and OMG she was hysterically funny!!  We then showered and took a 45 minute drive to a local touristy spot.  It’s a really nice spot, we walked around, ate lunch, then after a couple of hours…headed to the casino for some fun.  Um yeah, we both suck, neither one of us won any money but we still had fun! 

Sunday, HAHA you would have thought we spent the entire night partying.  We got up around 7am, then laid our asses on the couch and recyliner and slept on and off until around 10ish.  My friend woke up and stated she felt like someone kicked her butt…haha she was sore from playing the wii, actually I was too.  It’s amazing a video game can have that effect, and truthfully I think she was a little surprise by her body’s reaction to it.  We headed out around 1ish, packed a lunch and went to a nearby state park.  This park has beautiful falls.  I would post a picture, but we all know I can’t so I’m not going to torture myself and try.  We walked around, and took MANY MANY pictures..hahah just ask Kellie…haha I think she was a bit shocked..I think it totaled almost 130 some odd pics.  Just for the record, My friend also took some pics.  Oh yeah, Kellie – the reason there are so many flower shots?? I figured out a new feature on my camera so I was “trying” it out!! haha! Sounds good right??  We spent all day up there just enjoying the nice weather and the beautiful views.  When we got back home, we parked the car and walked to an ice cream stand…it was yummy! My first of the seasoN! 

Yesterday, she left around 9 in the morning.  We both needed to head out early otherwise we would be STUCK here for hours.  You see, where I live the local townies like to converge for events.  Yes being memorial day there was a parade and a memorial service.  Now don’t get me wrong, I would love to attend the service but the problem is, if I didn’t leave before all of these events I get blocked in.  My driveway is blocked off and I am forced to stay.  So I left when she did.  I went up to one of my friends camp.  Sat out on their boathouse and fried! It was beautiful. That is until it decided to rain around 1:30.  But still a couple hours spent with friends, talking, sitting in the sun, it was fun.  I spend a couple hours there, then came home. 

That pretty much sums up my weekend, all in all it was fun.  Again having company here, kept me going and feeling good.  It was good.  Hope you all had a great weekend as well!

 

 

I swear I’m on the verge of a nervous breakdown!

May 22, 2008

UPDATE:

***Um yeah I will LIVE!!  I called my doctors office first thing this morning…it’s Nothing big…no real concerns…….AAAAAHHHHHHH  at least that is behind me!!! ***

 

Work..um yeah..enough said.  Nothing has changed..it’s still crazy!

YEsterday I bolted out the door at work right at 4pm.  For once I REFUSED to stay 1 minute later than I should.  I leave and drive to best buy to purchase a mp3 player for one of my kids.  He’s leaving on Tuesday, and I got permission (with his money) to get him a mp3 player.  So off I go.  WHile I’m there I decided to pick up some goodies for myself.  I purchased Mario Cart and Wii ski, yup 2 more games for the Wii!  I still have yet to play them but hear they are a lot of fun.  So far so good.  My mood at this point is ok…

Then when I walked into the door and saw the light on my answering machine flashing, I clicked play.  This is when I completely flick the F out!  It’s a message from my doctor’s office.  You know the one I went to on monday.  It’s a message to call them back.  Of course it is now after hours, but hell I pick up the phone immediately and call the number. NO ANSWER. DAMMIT!  I flip out.  Start Hysertically crying, thinking shit something is wrong with the tests they took.  This office never calls if everything is ok.  I immediately turn on my computer and write in the search bar…”causes for missed periods” here’s what this lovely search leads me to: stress (check), thyroid issues (check), ecessive exercise (check..although it’s not ecessive still A lot more than normal), then it says, brain tumor (WTF?), pituitary glands tumor (are you serious?), STD (great..just what I need), cervical cancer (perfect…)  So the list goes on and on and by now I’m completely freaking out.  Now I know, I have no std’s, but I go a look at every single one of them and their symptoms, then look at the symptoms for brain cancer, cervical cancer, the pituitary crap..yup..I’m freaking.  I’m not still crying..maybe even harder.  I pick up the phone, call one of my friends, and tell her…she calms me for the moment,  I swear…one more f’ing thing wrong with me..I am going to completely go nuts and not in a good way.  I seriously can’t handle much more.  For the love, just give me a f’ing break! 

Now I know I’m completely over reacting, but seriously at this point all I can think about is the worst possible case senerio.  I’m thinking, great I have cancer and all my insides are going to be ripped out, so now not only will I not be able to have kids EVER (which honestly will break my heart TOTALLY), but I will have to deal with chemo, radiation and the whole 9.  There is tons of other stuff going on in my f’ed up brain of mine but this one above scares the living daylights out of me.  This is my WORST FEAR ever!!!  Dear god, I need help!  What pisses me off the most, is the doctor’s office called at 11 yesterday morning.  Called my home, now please tell me why do they ask for alternative phone numbers if they dont plan on using them?? They have on record, my cell phone and my work number, would’nt you think they would have called one of those numbers?? Then I wouldn’t be a mess right now!!!!!!  Like I said, if when I call back this morning, if it is something stupid, yes I will be happy, REALLY HAPPY, but I tell you after a night of completely freaking out and crying all damn night, I’m going to kick some serious ASS!!!!

 

THis morning…..

May 20, 2008

I feel good!  🙂  Yes I know it’s a miracle! It’s the first time in a LONG time,

1) I’ve woken up and have not had saggy, puffy bags under my eyes. 

2) I do not feel like my eyes are pee holes ..they are not swollen… 

3)  I’m not completely exhausted

4) I’m actually looking forward to going to work and accomplishing SOMETHING! 

5)  My body isn’t screaming at me with pain!

6)  This is the best I’ve felt in quite some time!! I’m excited!

I don’t know..maybe it’s because I actually went to bed at 9:30 last night.  I tried to stay up to watch the bachelorette…but the more I fought it the more tired I was.  So I said screw it..set my dvr and off I went to bed.  Today will hopefully be a good day!!  Lets keep yoru fingers crossed!

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On another note:  Why is it ok to minimize how someone feels?  YES I know I’ve done nothing but complain the past couple months and I’m sure you are all extremely sick of my whooisme posts.  But really, for me this is my outlet.  THis is how I talk about it.  This is how I express how I’m feeling.  I know I will get past all this..I know to you it may seem like I’m blowing everything out of proportion…but really? I can’t help how I feel.  To me this is real!  TO me it is as extreme as I am writing it.  I live this every.single.day and yes it even gets old to me, but this is how I feel and really as much as I hear, “hang tight..it will pass” it doesn’t help much.  Because really it’s been months..and I’ve “hung tight..and NOTHING is passing”  in fact, I think (In my world) it’s getting somewhat worse.   My thoughts, my feelings, my actions…not getting any better!!!  Just an FYI –  This isn’t directed at anyone on here!!! 

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This weekend I think one of my college friends is coming down for a visit.  We were talking last night..and she could sense I need a friend to hang with and offered to come for a visit.  I’m excited.  She is my freshman year roommate.  We met as we were moving into our room the first day of move in day at college.  We both ended up in the elevator at the same time…she was the hippie type, with the grateful dead teeshirt on, the nose ring, to name a few.  I was the homely, country girl, with a MILLION bags and suitcases.  We both looked at eachother and thought..”dear god, please tell me she isn’t my roommate!!”  Yes we BOTH said that to ourselves!!  When we got off the elevator and headed to the same room…we were both like “OH GREAT, SHE IS MY ROOMMATE!!!”  It was hysterical!!  We talk about that ALL the time!!  Who knew 14 years later we would still be the best of friends and still keep in contact and still make time to visit and call eachother!  I’m so looking forward to her visit!!  It has been since August since I’ve seen her. Usually we get together twice a year.  In August and in December.  I didn’t go see her in December because I wanted to get back home ASAP and spend some of my vacation time with the ex.

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Tonight, my friend and her baby are coming over for dinner.  I’m making cheeseburgers and fries.  We are going to watch the movie “the Jane Austin Book Club”.  I watched it over the weekend and LOVED it, now she wants to see it..so will rewatch it tonight! I’m excited to hang out with them! I absolutely love her baby!!  She is so darn cute and such a happy baby!!  I hung out with them on Sunday and had a great time!!  Don’t worry, I will be DVR’ing dancing with the stars and american idol.  I can’t miss them!!

I swear I need help??

May 19, 2008

Ok so for most of my day it was nice, relaxing and a day of nothing.  I was going to go for a walk, but it’s too damn cold out so I opted for my treadmill instead.  I walked for 10 minutes than ran for a couple minutes then back to walking, did this for about 40 minutes.  Felt good.  Don’t know what I started running..but I guess I just felt the urged..even though it kicked my ass.  THen chatted a bit on im with my aunt then talked with her  on the phone for a bit, and she entertained me with her little one. She was attempting to get Morgan to go to use the potty, and well Morgan expressing that her favorite store was Tar-GHIT!  It was hysterically funny.  THen after getting off the phone I decided to take a little nap, while watching my favorite soap opera.  The got up and showered and off I go to my doctors appointment.

My doctor’s appointment was with my lovely OBGYN.  Fun FUN!  The reason I went is because I’ve missed my period for the past two months.  THis has never happened in the past so with everything in my life right now…it caused me to be concerned.  So I go in and my doc, looks at me like I have 15 heads..no really she did.  I told her why I was there and she was like, yeah, so?  Then goes on and explains, that this is normal for people who are on the pill to miss their period.  I then snapped at her, I mean like really snapped..I was snotty, rude..and it should not have happened.  Reason for me snapping, because I felt like she was treating me like a complete moron, who knows nothing, the way she was saying it, it was very demeaning.  I am NOT a stupid person, yes I may be a worry wart and at times a bit extreme, but dont ever confuse that with being stupid.  I then feel horrible, because of me snapping.  She then asks what else is going on with me? Here is where I completely LOST IT.  I started crying.  Then I just tell her, it’s stress.  Stress in my personal life, work, and pretty much every other aspect of life in general.  She then starts asking questions…again while I’m still crying.  I swear. She then proceeds to do what we all pay OBGYN’s to do and is running tests just to make sure I’m AOK.  But she believes I’m fine and normal and with all the crap I told her today, she too is relating it all to stress. 

I’m thinking I need to go talk to someone.  If I can’t even go to a damn Doctor’s office and not break down…somethings up.  Like I’ve said before…my moods are killing me.  One minute I’m fine, the next, I’m hysterically crying…grr..I hate it.   Just when I feel like I’m getting back on track, something hits me, and I’m back in the dumps again!! Dear god.  Will it ever end?? I’m obviously not doing such a good job handling and “processing” all this crap on my own…I’m seriously thinking of getting some outside help.  I can’t hurt right?

A DAY OFF!!

May 19, 2008

So to answer all of your questions, YES I did take today off!!  My plan for the day?? TO do absolutely NOTHING!  I do have a doctor’s appointment, which is really why I took the day off..but thats it.  I did bring work home with me..but so far..I have no wanting to work on it.  I have a million other things I could do..but you know what?? I’m not doing a DAMN thing!  I am going to be a total BUM today! 

 

A needed day away from the office….

May 16, 2008

Yesterday all my staff had a break from the office.   It was nice.  I had scheduled a full day training for all of us to attend.  It was an awesome training.  It was all about learning disabilities and accomodations and different types of classifications.  It was great. 

My one problem?? Teachers are the abosolute WORST audiences.  By this I mean, every single thing that a teacher would yell at a student about in their class, yup they were doing it.  There were TONS of side conversations going on.  Laughing, joking, interuptions, you name it, it was done.  And really? it was VERY annoying.  For some reason yesterday I was very sensitive to noise.  I was trying extremely hard to concentrate on what the speaker was saying, as I was truly interested and learning new things. However, I had a very difficult time.  It totally sucked.  I was getting extremely frustrated with all the side conversations.  My “glares” did not stop them, in fact I don’t even know if the people guilty of the act even noticed me looking giving them the “teacher look”.  If they did?? The could have cared less…

While on break, I even asked the speaker to make an announcement for everyone to Stop the side conversations.  Yes I know it was childish, but really you have know idea how LOUD they were.  I think I have a little OCD “sensitivity” to noise.  I believe I’m totally taking after my father.  When things get really loud, or people start talking over people, I tend to freak out.  I can’t stand it.  It truly bothers me ALOT, especially when I’m trying to really concentrate!  I tend to focus on all the noises rather than the speaker or whatever it is I’m supposed to be focusing on.  I literally can not stand it.  To me it feels the same way as someone going up to a chalkboard and running their fingernails down it.  I get that same irritated, uneasy feeling.  Pisses me off, really.  I just don’t understand how people can be so rude.  Even if the speaker sucks..SHOW SOME RESPECT!  SERIOUSLY!  We are all “professionals” and this is how you act?? Give me a break!  I was really embarassed to be classified in the same group as these people.  I understand, some of these people haven’t seen eachother in a while, but still, as I tell my kids, “there’s a time and place, and now is not either”. 

ANyway, after the announcement was made to keep conversations to a miminum it was a little better.  I did learn a lot and it was a great training.  Very informative.  It was great to get the latest and new information and updates.  THe best part?? We didn’t have to go to work!!  We had to travel 45 minutes away, but who the heck cares..it was a nice break!

I’m debating on taking a personal day on MOnday.   I have an unexpected doctor’s appointment.  I would have to leave work early anyway, and I still have 2 personal days I have to use up before the end of the school year.  So I’m thinking, a 3 day weekend would be awesome!  Plus that would mean, I would only work 3 days next week, seeing how we have friday off!  That sounds totally awesome to me. So we will see.  I have to ask first if it is even possible to do.  If we don’t have enough administrative staff working, then chances are I will not be able to take the day.  Regardless, the school year is almost over! Granted it isn’t ending quick enough, but at least it is coming to a close.  And the next 2 weeks there are only 4 days of work, so that helps.  Now if I can just push the time ahead and move the calendar along a little quicker, things would be totally awesome!

Online Update…

May 15, 2008

Like I’ve posted before, a couple weeks ago I put my profile back up on the dating site.  FUn FUN!  Oh the joys!  I then decided, screw it and posted a picture with it last week.  Since then?  I’ve gotten many hits.  I was talking with someone via email, however, he seemed like her was a serial emailer.  Never asked questions about me, just aswered ones I asked of him.  So? As low as it may sound, I just stopped emailing.  I think we emailed for like 2 or maybe even 3 weeks.  I spent a year in a half with a man that did nothing but talk about himself, and showed little interest in what I liked, needed or how I felt and really?? This type of person is not someone I want to be with.  Like the old saying…been there done that..and not going back!  So yup ended those emails, and have yet to hear from him again! Guess he wasn’t truly interested.  Whatever, he has no idea what he’s missing out on.  I actually paid for a month’s subscription last night.  Figured it was really hard to get anywhere if you can’t really chat or correspond…so I sucked it up and paid.  Figured I will try it again for 1 month.  So far, last night? I had like a MILLION people looking at my profile.  NO Idea why last night it was so popular, but it was.  I had a million (ok so I maybe exaggerating a bit) messages waiting.  I also had 3 different people instant message me through the site.  One of the guys, I actually “talked” to online for like 4 hours, then? I called him.  I know stupid.  I tried using the caller ID block, but I had to take it off, because he doesn’t accept private or anonymous callers..great.  Let’s just hope he isn’t a stalker and doesn’t look up my number and find out where I live.  He sounds ok.  The problem, he’s 41, and when I called him I found out he stutters.  Not that that is really a problem, but just very difficult at times to understand him, as I was not expecting that.  So we will see, I’m thinking this is a 1 time date, then time to move on..hell who knows I could be wrong.  The other guy, haha freaking pervert.  He instant message me, so I asked him to show me a picture, because he didn’t have one posted, and turns out he has webcam.  I lied and said I didn’t.  He then proceeds to tell me he was feeling horny and wanted to know if I wanted to see his “thingy”!! Yes your reading that right…he really did ask me.  I basically told him to grow up and left the conversation.  Seriously?? By the age of 30, you would think you would be over that crap..apparently I’m wrong!  As for the 3rd guy, when I responded he had signed off…oopsie a little late.  Whatever. 

I’m trying.  I’m trying to just throw myself back out there!  I hate the process though to be honest. But whatever we all at one time or another had to go through weeding out the bad ones to get to the good ones…wish me luck!  One thing I need to stop, is thinking “oh the ex would have never done  or said said that” or “the ex ..blahblahblah” you get it! I just need to stop it.  I am guessing it’s nornal but still. 

One thing I totally realized last night, while talking with the 1 guy for hours, was that I was burned and scarred badly by the ex.  I’m finding it hard to just open up and be me….  Thanks to the ex, I feel this was the start of my doubting myself.  Doubting my self worth, my qualities, qualities I know are good.  Knowing he didn’t respect me, or everything I was about is something I’m having a hard time swallowing.  Although I’ve doubted and still do..but deep down I know I’m a good person and a good “catch”.  I know whoever I end up with, whenever that is, will be happy, I will do everything in my power to make sure.  I also know that whoever I’m with will be the exact opposite of everything my ex was not.  Yes, he did have some good qualities, otherwise I wouldn’t have stayed with him for so long, but there are so many more qualities I’m looking for, ones to me are important.  I can and will be patient.  I realize I will never be happy if I just settle because I have someone.  I’m no longer willing to just overlook certain things and to just accept things as they are.  I realize I will have to compromise on somethings and for that I’m totally willing to do, but the things that are most important to me, COMPROMISING is not happening. 

Oh the joys of online dating….gotta love it…hmm I think!